Interracial dating

I am often asked why I like to date Asians... and this question frustrates me. I often wonder whether this question is a test to see if I have some limited view that Asians are "smooth bottomless boys." I always say, "Well, I didn't sit down one day and decide who I like." So no, my attraction is not based solely on sex qualities.

I know what I'm attracted to but why is it such a problem for other people to understand?Well, it's cause it's unexpected and it's not the norm. Actually, I usually throw the interracial dating question back in someone's face by asking, "Why do you like who you like?" People just accept the fact that Whites like Whites and Asians like Asians. To me, it seems that in either case it's a matter of conditioning. We are brought up and spend time with certain groups and as a result we grow to like those groups. Well, since junior high school I've had many Asian friends. I must say, I was attracted to my female friends from the start.

But here's another side of the story, one that is difficult to explain without offending people. I think that interracial dating is about power. I mean, White people are generally still priviledged in Canadian society and therefore I benefit from this power. Now, believe me, I am totally about equality and I'm not suggesting that I date Asian guys because I think they're lower than me or even that I feel inadequate about dating other White guys.

There is something to be said though about the ratio of Asians and Whites who are attracted to the different group. I mean, I have power because there are far more Asians who like White guys than the other way around. I've known this for a long time and I think it is fair to say that certain power comes from this. But of course with great power comes great responsibility. Hehe... and to this statement I mean that I don't take advantage of my situation. I date just like anyone else would... I date to meet people and I treat the other person as an equal and consenting adult.

Okay, so hopefully I haven't offended anyone so far.

And I'd just like to add, why the racial view anyway? I mean, if I have children I don't want them to be called "mixed." They are my children, human beings... not "mixed!" Anyhoo, I guess my next campaign should be about educating the public on the sprectrum of race.

Recently I had the opportunity to "date" someone who does not share my nationality, his name is Torsten. I knew it would be difficult to date someone of a different nationality, but I never thought that it would be such a great problem. I have always enjoyed being Canadian but I never thought about how people of other nationalities see the world.

Well, I don't know how Torsten viewed Canada, but I've realized again the power that I have. As a Canadian I am one of the wealthiest people in the world who enjoys great social liberties and rights. Until you are touched by someone from another part of the world or visit abroad I don't think you realize this.

I've never wanted to leave Canada; I love this country. But Torsten, being from China really wanted a new life, something different... change. I never thought about what he wanted because I always assumed that everyone in this world could carve out the life that he/she wants. I guess I now realize that that isn't possible for everyone.

Through this experience with Torsten, I have realized how important it is to me that I find someone who is able to be with me and work towards the things we want. I am sorry to have lost what I had with him.

Always learning, always growing, always on a quest.